Archive for June, 2008


YEAH!

School holidays are here! Woohooo!! Now I don’t have to switch my nag button on in the morning. The children can wake up at whatever gosh darn hour they wish and I can decide to do something at 2 in the afternoon without having to worry about the school pick up. Best of all I can finally spend time with my 7 year old and the boys can play like brothers and by that I mean they can fight constantly and annoy each other and their parents to tears.

Bliss.

Plus you lucky ducks will get to read more from me as I will have more computer time and aren’t you all so happy about that?

HUH?

HUH?

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I have taken a whole month (or more – I’m living on the edge here) from work. I do love my job but I’m finding that it’s just time for me to take a break. I don’t know when I will return although I am anxiously awaiting the bank account to dwindle to pennies, my stress levels to climb to INSANITY levels and my brain to forget absolutely everything veterinary related such that when I do eventually go back to work, I won’t have a clue what I’m doing. And won’t you all be glad you made that appointment with the SCARF LADY? On the good side, I will have some family time – it’s heartbreaking when the children ask “which one of you is going to work today?” So now I actually get to see husband (this last weekend I must have spent all of FOUR hours of awake time with him) and the kids will have TWO days each week where the whole family is together. How ever will they cope?

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We had a busy day today:

- gym

- haircuts for all the boys and don’t they just look so handsome mashaAllah

- home for food

- cook and tidy up

- lunch & pray

- park

- cemetery to visit my grandmother’s grave (may Allah grant her jannat)

- home

- whinge

- read to kids

- cry

- fighting

- husband to the rescue

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I think we are all familiar with the gastrocolic reflex – you see it often with little children – the minute the stomach is full, they need to empty their bowels. It’s like clockwork, honestly. But are you aware of these?

1. The Home-Urethral Spasm – Sufferers are not aware of any need to urinate until the home door is in sight. Once car is in the driveway or key is in the door, the person becomes acutely aware of URGENT need to urinate resulting initially in the crotch grabbing dance followed by front door left wide open or handbags, shopping bags and even children dumped on the floor. In extreme cases the odd child may be left in the car (<—-has not happened to me).

(yet)

2.  Motherhood Gag Reflex -  mothers are able to stomach bodily fluids such as vomit, mucous, urine and faeces (and by that we mean ALL kinds of faeces from the rock hard to the liquid kind) of their own children without so much as a retch. Odours and excretions from others’ children however do not possess any protection and so gagging and retching will ensue if in eyesight, earshot and nosesmell.

3. On The Way Out Bladder Reflex - When everyone is sitting in the car, ready to go SOMEONE needs to use the toilet. Sufferers are almost always children. Likelihood of occurrence is directly proportional to how late family is for event.

4. On The Way Out Nappy Reflex - similar to above but involves babies and children not yet toilet trained. Babies displaying an active OTWONR usually progress to OTWOBR as they grow older.

5. Selective narcolepsy – Sufferers feel inexplicably exhausted upon seeing the number of dishes to wash.

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So dear readers, have I missed any?

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