Life with a 2 year old
Posted by Tasmiya
2 year old: I want roti sugar!
Tasmiya: Here you go.
2 year old: No, I don’t want roti sugar!
I want noodles!
Tasmiya: *sigh* OK. Let me make it for you.
(places bowl of noodles on table)
2 year old: I don’t want noodles!
Tasmiya: How about you try to make a wee in the toilet.
2 year old: I don’t want to make a wee!
Tasmiya: Ok fine, just don’t go and make it on the carpet - call me if you need to go and I will help you.
(moments later)
2 year old: I MADE A WEE ON THE CARPET!
Tasmiya: ARGGHGH!
2 year old: I want to go see Naani.
Tasmiya: We have things to do at home so maybe another day.
2 year old: BUT I WANT TO SEE NAANI!!
(managing to get all house stuff in order, get the boys ready and drive to Mum’s. Pull into the driveway)
2 year old: Awww I didn’t want to come HERE!
Tasmiya: *sigh*
A Rose By Any Other Name
Posted by Tasmiya
I’ve never been much of name dropper and sadly it’s because I’ve never had any names to drop.
UNTIL NOW.
Guess who came to dinner? He has his own WIKI for goodness sake! It was a wonderful evening mashaAllah, he came bearing a stack of gifts from his beautiful wife, and the kids just adored him.
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BEFORE
Farhad: Do you think I can call him Wal or Wally?
Tasmiya: You are NOT calling him “Wal” or “Wally” or anything else. He’s WRITTEN A BOOK! People called “Wally” play rugby league (not union) and they DON’T WRITE BOOKS.
Farhad: What about QWALID like Talib KWELI? (obscene language warning)
Tasmiya: No!
Farhad: Awwww!
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Tasmiya: I dare you to stand near the arrival gate with a sign when you pick him up from the airport.
Farhad: You’re on.
The sign?:
Farhad actually did it, much to the amusement of Waleed and many other passengers disembarking.
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DURING
Tasmiya: Let Uncle Waleed show you what…is it ok if they call you “Uncle?”
Waleed: Sure, I don’t mind what they call me.
Tasmiya (thinking): Oh dear God, please don’t let Farhad call him “Wal.”
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AFTER
4 year old: Hey, remember when Uncle Woolley came and he drew the Batman sign?
Tasmiya: Yes, I do remember. It was really nice, wasn’t it? You know his name is Waleed.
4 year old: Uncle WILLY? His name is WILLY? HIS NAME IS WILLY??!!
Tasmiya: No, WaleeeeeD.
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You’re pretty alright, Susan’s Husband.
The In Tune with his Feelings Child
Posted by Tasmiya
You know what I’m talking about, right? There are children who cry for no apparent reason - most of the time they don’t even know why they are teary or angry or upset. Then there are those rare ones who seem to know exactly what is wrong, be able to verbalise it, sure they have a cry but quickly they move on - happy that their feelings have been heard and acknowledged.
My four year old is one such child.
An example:
D: So when Wudsie died then we only had Adam.
Tasmiya: Yes Adam was all by himself.
D: Then Noodles came. But if Adam dies then Noodles will be by himself and then if Noodles dies then we will have no cats.
Tasmiya: That’s right. No more cats. Unless we decide we want another one.
D: I don’t want another one.
Tasmiya: That’s ok then.
D: (Beginning to sob) I want Wud-you back. I want Wud-you to come back.
Tasmiya: Oh my darling. He can’t come back. I can’t bring him back.
D: (More heartfelt weeping) I loved him so much! Adam was always mean to him and Wud-you was so nice.
Tasmiya: (Hugging him and crying too) Yeah, Adam was very mean, wasn’t he?
D: It isn’t fair! Wudsie was the nice cat!
Tasmiya: No. It isn’t fair. You miss him don’t you? We all miss him. He was a wonderful cat.
D: Yes. I miss him so much.
D: Can I have a chocolate?
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The finality of death covered? Check!
Life goes on regardless covered? Check!
The unfairness of death covered? Check!
Chocolate heals what ails you - Check!
Guaranteed to be said at Dinnertime
Posted by Tasmiya
Proudly brought to you by 4 year old:
“Actually, mum. I was only joking when I said I wanted more…”
“My stomach hurts.”
“I didn’t say I wanted this!!” When in actually fact, the other 4 in household are sure he did.
“I’ll just have toast and maple syrup.”
“So…even if I don’t finish this, I still get dessert? Cool!” Umm..No.
“This part has gone rotten.” In the time it’s taken to get from the pot to the plate?
“Actually, I wasn’t hungry when I started eating.”
“Do I have to finish all of this??”
“But I already ate at lunchtime!”
A Typical Argument at Our Place
Posted by Tasmiya
Him: (incoherent mumble)
Her: What did you say?
Him: Oh, nothing. I was just doing my usual passive-aggressive thing.
Her: (upset) But I’m supposed to be the passive-aggressive one and YOU’RE the one supposed to be annoyed by ME!
Him: No, it’s the other way around, don’t you remember?
Her: NO! I don’t remember that.
Him: OK! FINE! YOU CAN BE THE PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE ONE!
Her: No, it’s ok. I don’t mind. You can be it.
Him: Oh dear, no. I’d hate to take away from your calling.
Her: No. Actually I insist. You be the passive-aggressive one. I’ll just have to find another personality disorder.
But that’s really ok.
I don’t mind.
Don’t worry about it.
*sighs*
Him: *sighs*
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EVERYBODY! ROCK YOUR BODY!
Yes, backstreet’s I’m back!
Alright!
I think I needed a bit of time away from computer stuff and I thank each and every one of you who left comments and sent emails and text messages (well, it was only one text message but it was much appreciated and made me feel very loved.)
You guys are awesome.
So buckle up..it’s going to be a bumpy ride..arms in vehicle at all times…no smoking etc etc
From this article:
close to 70 per cent of young people ………said they felt aligned to the party of their parents.
Husband has warned me countless times not to thrust my political views onto my innocent children but sometimes I just can’t help myself. I had no idea how much attention they pay my spontaneous mutterings until today:
4 year old (listening to radio in car): Who is this man who keeps talking all the time?
Me: It’s Kevin Rudd.
4 year old: Why is he talking?
Me: Because he wants to be the Prime Minister. You know how John Howard is our Prime Minister? Well Kevin Rudd wants to be Prime Minister.
4 year old: Oh no!
Me: Well, it wouldn’t be that bad a thing to have a different Prime Minister.
4 year old: Because John Howard lies?
Me: Well…yes, John Howard sometimes doesn’t say the whole truth but so do other…
4 year old: and he doesn’t care about the people?
Me (secretly beaming with pride): Um…. Let’s just change the radio station, shall we?
Sorry husband, we have another potential Greenie in the family.
Actually no - not very sorry at all.
I Shouldn’t be so Mean
Posted by Tasmiya
Husband: I came up with a lame joke.
Tasmiya: Ok, what is it?
Husband: What do you call a guy who smashes a thousand parking meters?
Tasmiya: ………..
Husband: A killer meter (kilometre)! AHAHAHAHA!
(pause)
Tasmiya: But wouldn’t that be a meter killer?
(Pause)
Husband: Shut up!
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Tuesday Questions are still open, you know. You have a week to get them in since I am feeling so generous of late and it really has nothing to do with the fact that I think people might have no questions left for me.Oh my gosh have we all run out of questions? *sob*
Eid!
Posted by Tasmiya
Eid Mubarak to everybody. May Allah accept all our prayers and good deeds in Ramadan and may He bless you all with a wonderful day.
An impetuous “I love you, mum!” is one of the most awesome things about being a mum but there are times when my children can trump even that:
“I like you, mum.”
“And I like you!”
“No. I mean I really LIKE you!”
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When husband is trying to read the boys a story at bedtime:
“AWWW! Let mum do it.”
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While rapping one of Dr Suess’ books (you should all try it tonight - the kids will love it):
“You are such a good singer mum. You should be on Australian Idol.”
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I