To the lady in full make-up, hairdresser hairdo and designer sportswear, casually flipping through a magazine while cycling .00001 km/hr, glancing up occasionally to see if anyone is checking her out: GO HARD OR GO HOME. You’d burn more calories sitting in front of the TV and scoffing chocolate biscuits and the men are too busy checking themselves out to worry about you.
To the wanna be body builders lifting huge weights and then suddenly dropping the weights on the floor and swearing at the top of their lungs because they can’t finish a set: USE LIGHTER WEIGHTS! You won’t come across as a complete fool and we won’t have to worry about the floor caving in.
To the guys who use the dumbbells and put them in the WRONG PLACE: REMEMBER FROM WHENCE THEY CAME! I know you only use them for warm ups and the difference between a 15lb dumbbell and a 12.5lb may not be that evident to you but for a tiny lady like me, it means the difference between 2 days or A WHOLE WEEK of recovery.
To the gang of ELEVENTY people bagsing a machine so that nobody can have a go on it: HAVE SOME MANNERS! Spread yourselves around a bit.
To the men in general: USE DEODORANT for goodness sake. There are even signs when you enter. WHO NEEDS REMINDING on basic hygiene? You all, apparently.
To the aerobics instructor: Please change your mix of music. I’m getting really tired of Britney and Madonna ……..oh and Duran Duran for an aerobic class? What???