Category: Me! Me!


Wierd. This is how I spell the word and I just can’t believe that it’s actually “weird.”

I’ve been tagged TWICE which means not only am I loved but LOVED.

So 6 wierd things about me. I don’t think there is THAT much that is wierd really and I don’t want to make anything up so here goes – I am confident that I will get eleventy comments about how NORMAL I actually am*:

1. I only like fish that doesn’t taste like fish. I can’t stand any seafood that isn’t a fish and like I told my husband when he asked me if I wanted to eat oysters – If I wanted to eat something that tasted like the bottom of the ocean, I’d just go for a swim with a spoon.

All fish should taste like chicken.

2. When I love somebody (husband, children, cats), I want to PUNCH THEM and SQUISH them and SMACK them. It’s completely irrational but it isn’t like I want them hurt.

I just want to smack ‘em.

3. No matter how drab or dreary a book is, I have to finish it. Even if I am close to stabbing my eyes out . Must. Finish. Book. The only exception to this rule (and don’t we have to have exceptions to have rules or something) is Catch 22. I cannot get past the first 3 pages and I’VE TRIED MAYBE A DOZEN TIMES. My brother tells me it’s a great book and very funny so I’ll just have to take his word for it.

4. If I have butter on my bread or toast, every single spot of bread MUST be covered in butter or I will not eat it. If I am having cheese, it must be cut to cover the bread exactly. There must be NO overlapping of cheese either.

5. I once used my MIND POWERS to stop tiny hairs growing on my hands. I am a firm believer in the power of the mind.

It hasn’t helped with my big nose.

Or my monobrow.

I still believe.

6. I sort out adjectives into “good and bad” even when they don’t need to be sorted out into those categories. Big is always good and small is always bad. Happy is of course good and sad is very bad. Flat is good. Bumpy is bad. And so on and so forth. Ask me about any adjective and it has either a good or bad place in my head.

*This is a hint people – you are supposed to comment and tell me I’m normal**

**Or I will kill you

1. I hate brushing my teeth. I hate it so much I will actually delay going to bed. I’d rather be exhausted than actually do something that will take all of 5 minutes to complete. How does that even work?

2. I told my husband that I was “so over these kids!” on Sunday when we were all having a rough day. I’m not going to make any excuses for that – there isn’t anything that could justify those words coming out of my mouth.

3. I love to feel cold. So much so, I turn the fan on and leave the window open at night just so I can wake up from a deep sleep because I’m freezing.

4. I have a big nose.

5. Confession time : I watch (and LOVE) The Apprentice. There. I said it. I love it so much that I daydream sometimes about being a contestant on the show and then realise that – I’m not a successful business person, I don’t live in America, I wear hijab and I don’t wear power suits or short skirts so therefore couldn’t possibly be picked as a potential candidate and then I get all depressed about it until I can forget all of that and start daydreaming again. No. I don’t have a life. Why do you ask?

6. My favourite joke of all time -Q. What’s brown and sticky?

A stick!!! AHAHAHAHAH! I kill me!!

7. I weed my pants when I was 5 years old. It’s probably the first time I ever felt HUMILIATION.

8. I used to drink about a litre of Coca Cola a day when I was working full time. Combine this with random thing #1 and you will understand why I hate the dentist.

9. Oh yeah..I start work again in April inshaAllah. Just alternate Saturday mornings for starters.

10. I’m a nail biter and I just can’t stop. I’ve tried everything but don’t seem to have the will power.

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